Coaching a team of nine-year olds often proves to be a welcome reminder that football is actually meant to be fun.
As the boys (and girls) returned for a new season, I took the opportunity to ask them all what they considered their favoured position.
“I see myself as a holding midfielder; breaking up opponents’ play just in front of the defence”
“I think I operate best at full-back, providing counter-attacking width to a narrow midfield”
Yeah… there was none of that.
It turns out I have a team full of strikers.
Whilst I’ll admit to having certain reservations, I’m hopeful that when the transfer window closes in ten years’ time, there will be no last ditch attempts by Norwich City to bring in a new number 9 because (apparently) Norfolk is overflowing with budding centre-forwards.
But who can blame them?
Scoring goals is fun; scoring goals wins matches.
Who wouldn’t want to be a striker?
It’s the blue riband position. Would you rather win Olympic gold in the 100 metres or the shot-put? Because they’re of equal value, right?
Except we all know that they’re not.
And perhaps it’s that inner child within all of us that makes the signing of centre-forwards all the more exciting?
As we grow up, we learn to appreciate that football is a team game; the importance of other less glamorous roles; the need for a strong spine; the value of a clean sheet;
but somewhere deep down, all of us love a goal-scorer.
Because scoring goals is fun; scoring goals wins matches.
And that’s why strikers cost so much.
Reflecting on over thirty years of following Norwich City, the names of Fashanu, Deehan, Drinkell, Fleck, Roberts and Holt still stir emotions that no others (bar a certain D Huckerby) can.
But that’s six names in three decades. How many others have tried and failed to score the goals and win a place in our hearts during that time?
For every Grant Holt, there’s a Dean Coney; a Peter Thorne; a Chris Killen; a David Strivhavka.
Or worse.
Just like actors’ superstitions in relation to a certain Scottish-based Shakespearian play or the baldy nose-less villain from Harry Potter, I now refuse to utter the name of our most infamous number nine (which was available to put on your shirt for a bargain five English pounds).
But let’s just say that ‘he’ illustrates the problem that’s been facing Alex Neil and Jez Moxey over the last few weeks.
Because if you want to guarantee goals (those things which are fun and which win matches) you have to spend far bigger than the £8.5 million it cost us to bring ‘him’ to the club. And that’s before we factor in the ludicrously inflated prices generated in today’s market by new TV deals.
We need to face facts; we are a Championship side. And without top-flight status or the convenience and perceived lure of being close to London, the only way to bring that elusive 20-goal-a-season-man through the gates of Colney would be to shell out stupid money that we simply can’t afford.
Which brings me to Aston Villa.
Would I like a strike-force of McCormack and Kodjia?
Hell yeah I would.
Would I be prepared to pay £29 million for the pair (excluding wages)?
Hell yeah I would (provided it wasn’t my money).
But we don’t have those funds available.
It’s a shame… but it’s a fact.
As an aside, it’s commonplace for a buying team to play down the scale of a transfer or insist that the fee is ‘undisclosed’ to suggest that they got value from the deal. However the new Villa owner seems intent on demonstrating just how deep his pockets are and to openly publicise just how much money he has spent.
It’s an interesting ploy, which in the short-term will potentially curry favour with the Villa fans. Until such point that the money dries up or the big-money signings prove to be a waste of the big money.
(Again…don’t mention ‘him’).
Back to City. The signing of Nelson Oliveira was branded as a “shrewd” piece of business by our Jezza and at this time and I suspect that he is right.
Like it or not, the best we can offer potential goal-scoring heroes is the prospect of a ram-packed fixture list at Burton, Bristol or Barnsley rather than a ‘Super Sunday’
Next summer may be different. We might be shopping in a different market. But for now, we’re either forced to pay over the odds in a desperate attempt at ‘winner takes all’ or play (and pay) within our current means.
If we’re lucky, Oliveira may have added his name to the list of number nines who became part of City folklore and his name may well find itself on the back of my new shirt for next season.
If not, content yourselves that in ten years’ time I’ve got a team full of strikers ready to take you to the Promised Land.
Fair points, but I still have the nagging feeling that we could and should have looked at last season’s top scorers in league 1 and seen who was hungry and on the way up, and offered them a way to advance their career.
Quite a whimsical article and a good read.
What concerns me more is that (like you Steve Cook, no names mentioned) we have a minimum of four senior players that simply do not want to be here.
We have our dancing Chairman, a CEO Wolves fans are delighting in telling us they’ve got shot of and an intransigent old couple who have declared they’re here until Hades installs a working fridge freezer. Plus the gift of Young Tom and a man with the censor’s blue pencil on the Board.
Reasons to be cheerful, anyone?
Great article Steve, although not actually quite true.
My favourite thing as a youngster was tackling. At the rec. I could time it so as to trap the ball between my foot & that of much bigger kids, usually resulting in them going over.
I didn’t have the skill, balance or instinct for a goalscorer (although I was quick). And, strangely, although I was quick I wasn’t quick enough at any meaningful level. My favourite event was the discus; although not really big enough to succeed at county level the feeling of release when you got everything right was wonderful.
And you’re very right about the £8.5m striker. I always think of it in terms of buying a used car; if you can afford it go for a good make as new as possible, otherwise take a chance with a cheapie & keep some cash for repairs. Sometimes you can get great value out of an old banger!
Btw I helped out a teacher mate by reffing some under-11 matches not that long ago and got dogs’ from a couple of the parents on the touchline. Not a unique experience I know, but good luck with your 9-y-os:-)
When I played for my school in the 1970s you only had to look at the teacher Ref the wrong way and it was one telling off and then if there was a repeat it was OFF. How times have changed.
I’m optimistic about Nelson Oliveira but, in truth we don’t know how it will turn out. I wasn’t keen on either McCormack or Kodija, who between them have 1 goal from 9 matches this season. Not that they are bad players, but because they wouldn’t fit comfortably into City’s style of play. McCormack is a second striker who played behind Dembele at Fulham and now plays behind Gestede, not disimilar to Hooper in that regard, except that he’s going on 31 now and therefore a short-term option. Kodija would be a better fit, but he played on the left for Bristol City and that’s a position we have well covered. Oliveira, on the other hand, offers a different option to Jerome as the sole striker and is well suited for City as his game involves holding the ball up and then either scoring himself or bringing our AMs into scoring positions. Much more the way AN wants to play.
We bid on top Champ strikers who either their clubs didn’t want to and didn’t sell or McCormack who Villa gazumped us on stupid PL-level wages.
Oliveira was at Benfica in a top league, has played for Portugal, and has a decent Champ season under his belt. Doesn’t guarantee success with us but that’s a damn good pedigree he’s bringing for a 4-5 million tag.
Holty and Strihavka came from lower leagues with no-little pedigree – one was magnificent..
El Dingo(2): your (oft repeated) cheap and silly jibes at the board could be rephrased as;
“life-long, supporting, business-savvy Chairman, sensible CEO that Wolves’ fans are feebly trying to wind us up about (now they have a Chinese sugar daddy who actually has spent less than us in this window) and life-long supporting owners who have been magnificent in their backing of the club?” That would be my outlook.
What Balls chooses to do with his time is down to him. Do you honestly think that if he’d been in his office on Wed. night, we’d have signed a 20+ striker? I assume he’s got a phone with him at all times.
Good stuff, Steve.
I had the chance to pursue my fantasies into adulthood. No, not those fantasies – I mean I played striker for Capital Canaries in Division 5 of the exulted West Fulham Sunday League.
I also ended up playing a few times in goal, and I can tell you that mistakes are more costly (both on the scoresheet and your reputation) if you’re the keeper.
Maybe not in the case of Cameron Jerome, though….
As you say, we’ll see what Oliveira brings. If we get Pritchard and others firing, he should have a fair chance to impress us.
el dingo (2) – knock it off about Ed Balls on Strictly! Did we make such a fuss when our last unpaid non-exec chairman (Alan Bowkett) left business matters to his full-time Chief Executive?
Finally, it took me a minute to work out the striker you wouldn’t name. Thought it must be Sibierski…
Cosmo p, delighted to see actual support for our club! Really good to see having (like you I guess) read endless posts of supports endlessly moaning about our club. I love my team and will support them as long as I draw breath, and i for one am very happy having owners who share my support rather than simply wanting my money.
OTBC
Goran Maric?
more of a Chris Brown
Good article from Steve Cook.
I can well remember wanting the striker role, but never tall or quick enough so I settled for any position as long as it was on the left!!
Why are we so wound up by Mr. Moxey’s appointment? Unless I’m mistaken, whilst he was at Wolves he oversaw huge re-development of Molineux which resulted in a decent increase in capacity..and also found the Chinese (??) buyers who took over from Steve Morgan.
Fully on topic, I agree with Rick (5); all that money for a 31 year old plus a Championship player who didn’t do a great deal against us a couple of weeks ago. The money Villa have splashed looks ridiculous- I thought we did quite well earlier in the window to get 10 – 12m for Redmond, a reasonable operator in the Premier League – so 15m on Kodjia has to be a real gamble.
All will be well for them if it pays off, but if they are still in the Championship at this time next season…….
Chris brown! Forgot about him. Sent off on his debut for deliberate and pointless handball. Absolutely useless.
The Championship teams need grafters, players who never give up and so far ours have done well when on top. But I see a weakness when we are under the cosh, at Ipswich and Birmingham in particular we didn’t fight back, the ball didn’t stick with anyone when cleared, so if Nelson can just hold it up, it should improve the teams chances.
I personally would have looked at bringing in Patrick Madden from Scunthorpe, but it never happened, oh well, maybe January.
It’s a miracle we sign anyone at all.
#7 Stewart Lewis: fair enough, I hadn’t thought of it like that.
#6 Cosmo P: Fair play to you too, your opinion is the polar opposite of mine, but who is to say which of us is right? Certainly not me. I take slight issue with the terms “cheap and silly” though.
With a bit of luck and dare I say some different decisions, we could be well on our way to being an established PL Club by now. We are not. That is what irks me. I want the Club to achieve the best it can and so do most of us I am sure.
Maybe we have differing views on what exactly is holding us back.
Finally of course you’re right that Ed Balls can do what he likes – it’s just I felt that Twitter comments was a bit insensitive in its timing. And so did a big lot of others.
Anyway good results against Cardiff and Wigan will cheer me and a lot of others up.
el dingo (15): Thanks.
This site – unlike some others – proves that we can have civilised debate, acknowledging others’ points, without giving up our own views. And remembering that we all support the same club. Long may it continue!
Another name from the past…… Gary Rowell