If you still believe in Father Christmas, look away now.
Like every kid, my growing up was punctuated with traumatic discoveries and revelations.
Actually, I don’t recall the truth about Santa being a particular shock. Perhaps I had an inkling of it, even before my dad gave the game away by having a drink too many before his delivery to the bedrooms and falling down the stairs.
The real early-years trauma was my cat having to be put down after a fight. I loved that animal – known to everyone as Stewart’s cat, and called Patteson after the local brewery Steward & Patteson – with all my heart.
The next revelations were disturbing rather than traumatic: learning that appearance could be at odds with truth, that reality wasn’t always as it was supposed to be.
Examples include learning that Simon & Garfunkel weren’t close, while the Everly Brothers positively couldn’t stand each other. How could it be that such harmony in performance wasn’t a reflection of personal closeness?
Since they were Man United players, it amused rather than upset me to learn that Andy Cole and Teddy Sheringham, while dovetailing beautifully on the pitch, had nothing but a seething animosity for each other off it.
I’m not sure we’ve had anything quite like that at Norwich. Ted MacDougall probably wasn’t close to anyone, but his relationship with Phil Boyer (one of the best I’ve ever seen on a field) was at least cordial. Stringer and Forbes were, and remain, close friends.
Craig Bellamy had his moments, of course. Nothing in his time at Norwich quite compares, though, with his falling out on a team bonding (!) trip with Liverpool. His dispute with John Arne Riise during a karaoke night reached the point of Bellars threatening his teammate with a golf club.
You couldn’t make it up.
(In passing, I’m happy to report a lately-discovered truth. For a long time I believed the conventional wisdom that Laurel and Hardy weren’t fond of each other; it turns out they were. On the other hand, I understand Abbott and Costello was a double-act of pure mutual dislike.)
I’ve also always been bothered – illogically but powerfully – by the disconnect between footballers’ playing styles and their characters.
Surely a Liam Brady, Ian Crook or Wes Hoolahan should be an intellectual, fluently quoting French philosophers and tossing us elegantly-worded insights into the game. Whereas a Iwan Roberts or Cameron Jerome should be monosyllabic and slightly Neanderthal.
The truth is often very, very different. Some of the most subtle and artistic players (Wes excepted) can barely string two words together, while Iwan is a fine communicator and Jerome one of the most thoughtful and articulate people at Carrow Road.
I don’t know too much about Mesut Ozil and Olivier Giroud, but at this point it wouldn’t surprise me to learn that Giroud is the philosopher.
Duncan Forbes – not actually six-foot-two but a truly imposing physical player – had a brilliantly sharp and retentive mind, adding to the sadness of his dementia.
At least on Strictly everyone really does become close (in some cases, allegedly, very close indeed).
I suppose we can’t avoid talking about Norwich entirely. Articles on this site over the last few days by Ed Couzens-Lake and Gary Gowers highlighted, from dfferent angles, an issue that’s about as bad as you can get: an apparent lack of hunger in the players wearing the yellow-and-green.
I missed the Leeds game but have seen the goals we conceded. Even on just those three clips, our players conspicuously failed to challenge and put their bodies on the line as we’d expect. However reasonable or unreasonable other expectations are, that one is non-negotiable.
Whether it was lack of commitment or lack of confidence – the results of the two things can look very similar – it’s not acceptable. In contrast to some fans, I anticipate more changes for QPR than we had for Leeds; Alex Neil gave some of his players a second chance, but I don’t see him giving them a third one.
Actually, I may be appearing on the Carrow Road pitch at the Brentford game on 3 December. Not, I hasten to add, because anyone’s decided I’d be a better central defender than our current ones. No, I may be one of the party presenting a cheque on behalf of the Canaries Trust.
That’s definitely the limit of my on-field contribution.
Has ever the call for Lafferty been louder? For all his faults, failures, whatever I’m confident he’d give his absolute best. Personally I’d like to see two up to top with a 442 diamond set up. Perhaps I’m a traditionalist?
Mostly I’d like to be convinced they are trying their best. Coming out after Brighton and admitting they totally surrendered and players didn’t care was too appalling for words. I haven’t begun to get over that yet.
OTBC
Ncfcpaul (1): Thanks for the comment.
Regular readers will know me as a Lafferty sceptic. However, his words this week were well chosen and gave me pause for thought. If that’s the attitude he shows in training, I wouldn’t be surprised to see him given more chance.
If his attitude’s right, the main issue is fitting him into AN’s preferred style and set-up. But right now, attitude is arguably more important than ever.
I’m with Paul on that score. The admission that “some” players weren’t actually trying was disgusting and damaging.
It matters not anymore about the reputation of an individual player, more the amount of effort he will put into the game. Failure to pick a team that. Is a the very least interested in the outcome of the game is an abrogation of responsibility and should be terminal for ones career. If I owned a club with such low standards in the dressing room heads would roll.
To #1 #2 and #3: I very much doubt Lafferty will start on Saturday.
If a manager has a permanent down on a player it is likely to remain that way.
I too am a Lafferty sceptic, but in the days when Neil Adams played him wide left for some inexplicable reason, he always tried.
We do not know what goes on behind closed doors.
Let’s wait and see.
Martin (4): Thanks. You’re right about closed doors, of course.
The ‘inexplicable’ reason for Lafferty being on the left may be that he played in that position for Palermo, was signed to play there and said he was very happy to.
I agree Martin, Neil is unlikely to pick lafferty. Mainly because it would be the right call. Lafferty, in conjunction with Jerome would chase and Harry defenders, win headers, battle physically and give huge energy to our performance. It could also benefit our defensive capability by defending from the front and making the ball stick up top. The les tIme the ball spends in our half the better!
Thompson alongside tettey and the return of the energetic and pacy pinto would also be our best bet. We desperately need a clean sheet, the uglier the better.
Alas, I don’t believe Neil has the ability to make this happen.
#5 Stewart: I remember Lafferty saying he was happy to play anywhere but I genuinely had no idea he was signed for that specific role or that he played there for Palermo. Thanks for that!
#6 Chris: I agree with you about Thompson and Tettey. I am sure Pinto will return if he is fit. As much as I like your idea, I cannot realistically see Alex Neil going two up top, especially at a Holloway-boosted QPR.
(1) NCFCpaul & (3) Chris – “digging your team mates out, as Chris Sutton subsequently put it, is usually totally unacceptable. However, this wasn’t a usual performance. Far from it! Therefore, had Russ come out with the usual platitudes and cliques, he’d have rightly been critised. At least his post match comments, as uncomfortable as they would have been for some to hear, showed an element of caring, something that was clearly lacking from some of his teammates in that last 30 minutes at Brighton!
Gary (8), I was using the reference to martin and Neil’s post match comments that there was a lack of effort from the team to reinforce the point that this is in fact not my opinion but a fact. I think we can take the opinion of the manager and captain as read on that score.
It is often easy to blame an overall lack of effort and application for poor results and performances but we can all see that this is the real thing. Brady in particular pulling out of fifty fifties wasn’t a figment.
I’ve no issue with Martin “digging out” what an awful term! His team mates, aside for the fact that he was absolutely abysmal against Leeds next time out.
Martin, I agree Neil will probably pack the midfield again. For the reasons I stated before I feel that two up top would actually be more beneficial to the defence than the likes of Brady, hoolahan and Pritchard rolling over and showing our soft underbelly yet again. Basically, I’m just asking for some fight to be shown.
When I suggested trying 2 up front a few weeks ago ( before our recent slump ) there weren’t many takers , especially from the pro’ s on this site. Well one up front is certainly not working. It takes a certain type of player to play on his own up there. We don’t have one !! Even Grant Holt struggled with it after Lambert left. Given our recent form it’s certainly worth a try. I could understand AN not trying a change of system if we were taking teams apart. The truth is even in victory we have looked very ordinary. Give Lafferty à fair run in the team , at least we will see some effort , & passion. We are in the Championship , its more about hard graft than silky skills. Past promotions have been secured with players like Forbes & Stringer , Bruce & Watson , Fleming & McKaye & of course Grant Holt & Bradley Johnson more recently Perhaps Alex Neil can’t handle that type of player , hence the freezing out of Lafferty. & the selling of BJ Time for changes both on & off the pitch.
Victor (11): Thanks. I think the truth may be a little more prosaic, though.
Bradley Johnson was sold because he’s not technically up the Premier League. If we weren’t really trying to stay there (as some conspiracy theorists have suggested), we’d have kept him for sure.
Apart from the wild & ineffective performances he was putting in under Neil Adams, the big barrier to Lafferty now playing isn’t personality. He simply doesn’t fit with AN’s preferred style and set-up.
Given the need for change now, maybe AN will show more flexibility. But since we’re the second top scorers of the league, I doubt he’ll be thinking of two up front.
Good to get a response Stuart. Think this debate could rumble on I thinkWhile BJ may not have been the most technically gifted player he does have attributes that would have enhanced our chances of staying up last season. Other players ‘ not technically up to the Premiership ‘ were retained & after relegation even given extended contracts.certainly some of them were ‘ found out , particularly in defence Even the likes of Turner were sent out on loan for the premiership season , & recalled for the Championship. I think the difference with Bradley was all about his personality & perhaps the fee. Hope that wasn’t the case as with the money gained from promotion surely that should not have been a factor
In the case of Lafferty , I agree he didn’t look the part under Adams , but to give him the benefit of the doubt , he was being played out of position. My argument with Alex Neil in this case is that while one up front ( THIS SEASON ) is producing goals , it is at the cost of a formation in midfield that is causing problems in defence. Not once this ( or last ) season has he tried a different approach , or given the likes of Lafferty a chance as a main striker. Surely it’s a case of nothing ventured, nothing gained Even when CJ. was injured he preferred to play without a recognised striker , & we know the result of that one. We have 2 away games now , lose them both & we could go into December as mid table also rans By then it will be too late. The damage will have been done. The likes of Klose will jumpship in January & the opportunity for getting back in the premier gone
Thanks, Victor (13).
We’ll have to agree to differ on a number of points (as all fans do). Just a couple of quickies:
. If AN had a problem with BJ’s personality, he surely wouldn’t have made him the mainstay of the 22-game promotion push?
. The contracts of Turner & Whittaker are a complicated and misunderstood issue. Suffice to say they weren’t ‘recalled for the Championship’; my understanding is we just chose to honour their deals rather have to pay them to leave.
Fair comments , I obviously don’t know the ins& outs of contracts , but to us on the terraces the whole thing was greeted with disbelief. Still think the BJ saga was more to do with events off the field & was a mistake to sell him.
Anyway it’s history now , what we need now is a more vision from the management. AN & co need to get some of the players playing again & hopefully get unhappy fans like myself believing again.