I have never thought of South Wales as a particularly mysterious place – anything but in fact as the folks I met there through work journeys to a long-gone powder coating factory just outside Newport in the late 1980s were as straight as they come, saying what they thought with great clarity.
Everything about the place was down to earth, the people were great realists and first class in terms of affability, even if they tended not to hold back with their opinions and observations. There was no side to any of the guys I met.
Now I fully realise that Russell Martin is a Brighton boy through and through and had no discernible links to the Valleys when he moved from MK Dons to take over at Swansea City in August last year, so perhaps it takes an Englishman to create an aura of the unexplained and mysterious in that neck of the woods.***
After City’s 1-0 win at the Swansea.com Stadium on Saturday, “our Russ” was quoted in South Wales Live as follows:
“I feel sick to be honest. We’ve paid for a mad two minutes at the start of the game. We created so many chances today.
“A few of their [Norwich] players came off the pitch and apologised, which probably tells you the story of the game.
“I don’t think they felt they deserved to win – and I don’t think we deserved to lose.”
What a mysterious statement that is, brought to us by the same South Wales Live who awarded each and every home player a uniform rating of six, courtesy of one Ian Michelmore, reporting from Qatar. S’funny that, I would have thought Ian would have long been home from there by now.
We all know Russ from his being wheeled out time after time by both Chris Hughton and Alex Neil to face the media after what was seemingly yet another poor performance from the men in Yellow at the time. Did he ever come out with a falsehood? Certainly not within my memory.
So are we therefore to believe that some of our players approached him to say sorry for achieving a much-needed, backs-against-the-wall win that they must surely have been proud of?
The jury is out for me. I’m not saying it didn’t happen because I can’t and it certainly isn’t something that might be open to misinterpretation.
But really?
To my mind, this tale must sit alongside Thomas Malory’s Morte d’Arthur and Erich von Daniken’s Chariots of the Gods in terms of credibility.
Still, we all enjoy a good mystery. Especially when we can snap out of the mood it creates by reflecting on three points won away from home.
Another, somewhat lesser, mystery has not really been solved either, despite the best efforts of Morse and Lewis as channeled by James Colman and Gary G on these very pages yesterday: what animal have the Canaries returned from their Tampa Bay “training camp” as?
James plumped for an unlikely elephant [although in context he had a point] while Gary expressed relief that at least it wasn’t a tiny kitten.
I’m not too sure either but from what I’ve seen the beastmaster himself does not appear to have changed one jot.
Having clarified his pre-Florida statement thus: “I think what I said was we need to be a different animal. I think everybody knew I meant without the ball”, Dean Smith came out with what he must have thought was a gem immediately after the Swansea match, saying:
“I said to the players afterwards that 1-0 is my favourite result. I’ll take 5-0, but 1-0 is my favourite.”
I’m sure it was meant to be lighthearted, but each to their own Dean, each to their own. You’ve obviously never paid to watch a match in your life.
Yet another mystery we are no nearer fathoming out took a new turn this week. In the local media there is a possibility that NewsQuest has proferred an olive branch to the Football Club. Or just taken a break from praising some other well-known local eateries. You must tell me which of the two alternatives applies because I don’t have a Scooby:
Restaurant review of Yellows at Norwich City Football Club | Eastern Daily Press (edp24.co.uk)
*** Meanwhile the most confounding mystery of them all continues to remain unsolved.
There is still no sign of any progress with regard to the installation of my On The Wall City brick. Fear not dear readers, I shall keep you up to date with developments as they might – or might not – occur.
In the interests of topicality, I guess I’d better leave you good folks with my favourite track from Floyd’s Animals.
I’m in the crowd somewhere! It was called Raving and Drooling that day and nobody had a clue it would turn up 18 months later as “Sheep” on the Animals album.
Morning Martin, good old Floyd with a classic. I recently saw the Australian version at Ipswich do a very good job at this very track. Onto football I’m still waiting for a pack of hungry bloodthirsty Hyenas, nasty bastards one and all to turn up on the hallowed turf of Carrow road. However I don’t think they will be wearing yellow and green. Those shirts seem to belong to a motley crew of sheep, hamsters and those rather nice little fluffy bunnies.
Hi Andy
Yeah the image of bloodthirsty African Wild Dogs or suchlike is a good one, probably looking for the slowest, least healthy animal in a Yellow shirt to pick off.
Depends who plays on the day of course, but we’ve got a few of these for the hyenas or whatever to select from!
Cheers
Admittedly I’ve only seen the highlights but Saturdays performance looked pretty much like the pre World Cup ones to me.
Once again we seemed to be capable of only clinging to what we have in the second half. Swansea looked much the better team to the point where the tale of players apologising isn’t totally unbelievable.
I don’t know what happened at Tampa but we don’t appear to have come back any fitter, wiser or different from the dull animal that left.
If our club was fan focused the owners would have spared us this dross sometime ago.
With renewal time fast approaching I have very little enthusiasm for renewal as I’m absolutely fed up subsidising a millionaire pensioners hobby.
Hi John
*I’m absolutely fed up subsidising a millionaire pensioners hobby.*
I think even if I hadn’t got this debilitating illness that would have been the dealbreaker for me this summer as well.
Moaning about something while continuing to perpetuate it becomes really rather daft when the cold realisation of what you’re doing smacks you in the gob.
And when it takes them six days to acknowledge they played a friendly against Man City at St George’s Park – the local media didn’t bother to ask about it before the Friday press conference either – I do wonder if it’s all worth it.
Cheers
Your penultimate paragraph Martin sums up the position I believe a lot of fans now find themselves in. The longer we blindly renew our season tickets the more we are taken for granted by the owners.
John Lydon didn’t get everything right and he wasn’t a purist like Joe Strummer but he got one thing spectacularly right.
You know when you’ve been cheated.
Having had the distinct non pleasure of seeing us capitulate from a 1-0 early goal just before the break and now seeing out the win from an even earlier goal for 1-0, maybe the players are beginning to get a bit of the necessary attitude. Let’s hope so. We now need to see a few months of Fortress Carrer and more of these gritty away points. Burnley look uncatchable but that home game early in February will be a benchmark (I hope!)
Hi Roger
Some friends and I all agreed that Burnley look a cut above and I was really impressed with the finish for their second goal against QPR yesterday – the confidence just flows through that team, it really does.
Fortress Carra would benefit from the Club getting supporters onside once more but unfortunately I think too many bridges have been burned for that to happen.
I truly hope I’m wrong on that one.
Cheers
Morning Martin on this cold and wintry day – at least last night’s snow didn’t seem to come too far North!!
I too watched the highlights and from what I saw, the trip to Tampa may have been great for topping up fading tans, but as for coming back as a different animal’ – the jury’s out on that one.
Gunn certainly performed heroics in goal to keep the Swans at bay and despite McLean’s flick for Pukki to score, Connor lambasted him for some of his wayward passing.
I guess there was one positive (other than the undeserved 3 points!!) to take from the game and that was to see Idah back and fit.
Good morning to you to Ed.
Gunny Jnr is starting to command that area and those in front of him too – I was well impressed with what I saw.
Connor doesn’t really have a *lambast* mode – I’ll have to seek that one out 🙂
Cheers
Morning Martin;
There do appear to be a few glitches at Carrow Road, and they’re not only on the pitch.
Whilst I do have a “Brick in The Wall”, apparently the club are unable to issue my wife and self with membership cards for this season…..which, believe me, is fun and confusion in the club shop!
As to on the pitch activities, as I queried with Gary yesterday, how can you return from a 4 week break, one of which was warm weather training, and not play your most creative person because “he’s short of fitness”….
Almost as confusing as Russ’s post match comments.
Yes, it was a win, but I remain firmly unconvinced by our direction (or lack of!).
O T B C
Hi John
Lamenting the non-appearance of a brick is a bit of fun, but membership issues have a serious edge to them and I hope it gets sorted for you.
I must admit that is one area of the Club I have never had a problem with.
The Swansea win does not change the questions over our direction – or lack of it – one jot, as you say.
Cheers
Morning MR |P trust you are OK, I like a good mystery. the one that really makes me scratch an itch I don’t have is why are we still the same. After all these months Smudger has only succeeded in smudging a clear picture.. If we had not caught them cold from the start we would not have been so fortunate to claim 3 points, While I do admire the defensive efforts, protecting a fag paper lead. Is it really good enough ? 3 points were needed, 3 points attained, and I would feel exactly the same as Russ, sick as a dog , I somehow cannot see players apologizing, not being able to make eye contact now that’s another matter. Very similar to a few ref’s in Qatar.
I still look at Burnley who coach hasn’t had as long as smudger, they turned over QPR 0-3 in London yesterday. Now that is the way the protect a lead, score more. If they can do that, why the hell are we getting crumbs.
I honestly dread a promotion with this lot still holding the reins, but it probably the only thing that will save the club, what is galling to me is, people would see this as success, as they have the other doomed failures. different coaches same club management. surely that’s the constant. I don’t think there is much chance of that. They just had the ideal door to make changes, but they will wait until there is the very remote chance, before axing anyone. Any new guy will be given nowt to help him.
At times watching City, how they go about things, is like watching repeats on the BBC.
Hi Lad
I well know that this never makes a yardstick when considering *what makes a good manager*, but to compare the playing careers of Vincent Kompany and Dean Smith offers at least a point of reference in this case.
*Any new guy will be given nowt to help him.* is true. Neither will the current fella.
Those who have constantly said that without Delia we wouldn’t even have a club may well be twisting as uncomfortably as you with your itch right now.
I simply don’t see this lot getting promoted [heaven forbid if they did as you say] and £55 million debt makes Mark Attanasio’s £10 million investment rather meaningless in the strictly financial sense.
She won’t let him effect change anyway, as much as he is likely to push to do so.
Cheers
Marty, it would seem their wall building is akin to their team building, all mouth and no trousers. As to Smudger’s comments about 1-0 being preferable to 5-0 like you say he‘s never paid to watch a game. Looks as if there‘s going to be a lot of gritty backs to the defending for the rest of his tenure.
Hi Cutty
When you look at the make-up of the squad it really doesn’t lend itself to dogged defence – at least Hughton kind of had the personnel to do it.
As I said to John [above] my moaning about the brick is very much tongue in cheek, but if they can’t even get that right, it makes you wonder about more serious issues.
I promise I won’t be calling for a refund until the New Year – give ’em a chance, eh!
Cheers
Hi Martin
Hope you’re feeling better and unlike our international team crying in the rain after arriving back from Qatar last night no coach at the Birmingham Airport individual limos with police escorts to St George’s not bad for another exit from a WC tournament.
Rus Martin kept a straight face when he came out with that comment or was it tongue in cheek and as I said to Gary yesterday we all played at different levels and never apologised for a win but might have walked of and said hard luck but and that’s not apologising that’s commiserations to an opposition.
Like many I didn’t see any new animal just a team that rode their luck at times against a toothless fairy side that got more decisions from the Ref ( was he from Brazil).
Too little too Late will soon be the mantra again 4 weeks for a new man to bed in his ideas 💡 was a no brainer to everyone except our poor millionaire owners and a DoS dreaming he’s up some mountain or other.
I hope he gets a good signal on his mobile in January
Hi Alex
I really don’t know what to make of the RM comments even now. If they were a platitude to their fans it didn’t work – I checked out a couple of Jacks’ fansites out of curiosity!
I remember saying last week that I don’t care where Webber is and I certainly haven’t changed my mind on that one.
Smith cracked me up when he said it was obvious he meant we would be a different animal, but only off the ball.
Maybe he should realise that sometimes it is not so easy for us plebs to fathom the thinking of the great philosophers that stalk the earth.
Cheers
“Chariots of the Gods” Martin 😂 I remember it well.
I am pretty sure at least one or two of our players said to Russ that we were lucky to win, and according to my reports from The Liberty Stadium that certainly was true.
As for the returning animal, I suppose in a attacking sense it would be a Sloth.
I cannot agree with you more Martin on Vincent Kompany’s short time at Burnley. They look like we were under Daniel Farke. It seems to me that the championship is a very different beast to the one far back in my memory.
Footballing sides like Wolves, Leeds United, Fulham and Norwich City (Twice) have all won it in the last five years. And it looks like Burnley will continue that trend, who look like they came back from the WC break like a mixture of a Cheetah and a Lion.
So sitting here playing Smudgerball is not going to cut it.
I hate to say it but in true Along Come Norwich fashion I bet City’s home game on Saturday against Blackburn will be a very disappointing draw.
Blackburn haven’t had one all season so ……
I hope you soon get that brick Martin, looks as rare a bird as The Lesser Spotted Cantwell.
Hi Tim
I’m not sure about Malory but Daniken made megabucks out of that load of old pony – a bit like the money Webber [to his credit] got for the Murphy Bros way back when.
As for Todd the Obscure I wasn’t hardy enough to include him in the article because the concept of somebody who has knuckled down and pleased his manager in training needing, erm, more training before he can be selected is too risible to contemplate.
I didn’t know the Blackburn stat – I wouldn’t bet against it.
Oh joy, I can watch the full 90 on Saturday.
Cheers
One nil is Dean’s favourite score because it convinces our dumb owners that he should stay! As another contributor said we missed a trick by not getting a new man in with a four week “preseason “. The Smiths (all of them) will kill this club before they have done! It’s time for supporters to stand up before it is too late.
Hi Cyprus
The monstrous regiment of Smiths remind me of that old tale from mythology where the host tree and the ivy seem beautiful partners while all the time the ivy is strangling the life from the tree.
Okay I got my knowledge of the tale third hand via Manic Street Preachers but it remains valid in this case.
Dumb owners? Delia is listed almost universally as a popular TV Chef and MWJ as a successful publisher. Behave yerself 😉
Cheers
Well there’s a lot to chew over here, celebrate the 3 points and the away win , if nothing else it’ll keep the old laughing lady happy. The fast start was nice to see but I can’t help feel the emperor of Wyoming , Mark Annastasio , would not have been impressed in any way with our use of the ball in possession in that second half. Still we got away with it.
The Cantwell thing is a bit of a mystery , saying he needs more training sessions after being away for training sessions sounds like moopoo . It’s sad to see one of our homegrown in this situation but I believe we need to bite the bullet and let Todd go for whatever we can get in January.
Hi Bernie
As I said to Tim [above] I couldn’t be a$$ed to refer to Todd in the article.
He peaked like a hurricane but then seems to have faded just as quickly and I think you are right in that it’s time for him to move on, especially for his own sake.
I cannot imagine Mr Attanasio being impressed by very much at the moment tbh.
Cheers
I know I’m a cynic Bernard but could it be Todd has interested parties making a move in January?
If so the last thing he would want is to get injured.
Either that or a deal has been done and it’s NCFC who want an unblemished Cantwell safely in the dispatch room!
As ever, I’m a little slow on the uptake … and I think you may have something there, Martin. “Extra training” = “wrapping him in cotton wool between now and January”.
Maybe…
I haven’t heard anything concrete but I was told at the time that they were absolutely bricking it on Madders recovering promptly and properly so might have learned from that.
Im 100% sure that 1 of the Norwich after match player mysteries who have said that you didnt deserve to lose has been Teemu. Wales of course at least sounds like a big mystery to people outside Britain. Their own language is definitely very different to english language. I have spoken with some welsh and their english was quite easily understandable to me. There are some english who speak english in a way that its very difficult to understand, there has been some football youtube interviews which would have been very interesting but their english has made it impossible to listen.
You sometimes hear someone saying that their pet looks like a different animal with their new clothes on. So, I guess it has something to do with the new clothes of the squad? The monocle and walking stick are my next guesses.
Argentina-Croatia semifinal should be interesting in our tv. 1 of the studio commentators is absolutely a fanatic Argentina fan so all his opinions are 100% biased. Sadly Netherlands-Argentina was in another tv channel and even Jari Litmanen surely was hoping that Netherlands would have won he has always kept his emotions low. Actually for example premier league studios here are different than in most countries and the live match commentators are usually yelling. Valioliigastudio which means premier league studio is for some reason a compound word, so when someone is wondering how some finnish words can be so long, they actually are not but those idiots who first started to wrote that language in paper obviously had fun making so many compound words. Yes, its difficult for everyone so a common question here is this supposed to be a compound word or not? And the answer is that how could I know.
Hi 1×2
Here the Welsh language is considered unique with only Cornish and Breton [both in decline as working tongues] coming close. It seems to be spoken mainly in the middle and north of the country these days.
There is no doubt that English can sometimes be very difficult to understand for the non-native and often it depends on which part of the UK the speaker is from.
I’ve been to just about most places, mainly through work, and certain dialects occasionally confuse me as each large city has its own slang, or patois if you like.
Geordie [Newcastle], Scouse [Liverpool] and Glaswegian [Celtic, Rangers] are particularly difficult whereas the southern regions are much easier but do not have the charm of the northern, which help to give the folks that live in these areas their strong sense of identity.
Germany too has many compound words. I speak a bit of French and Spanish but I always struggled with German and simply gave up trying years ago!
Nordic languages are extremely difficult for people in the UK to get to grips with, although of course there will always be a few gifted people who can speak anything.
Would Teemu have said that to Russell Martin? I don’t know but I suppose he would probably be top of the list if anybody actually did!
As for the World Cup I am delighted for both Morocco and Africa – it really was about time. I cannot see Maroc beating France although I would love it if they did 🙂
Kiitos
Hi Martin
Well a possible replacement for DS&SS Neil Critchley can be taken off the list he’s now at QPR.
A young man said to me over the weekend possibly thefeelers have been put out and no one wants to join a rudderless ship and he’s a Spurs supporter that has City as his second team.
Anyone coming to our club will know that any recruitment will be only what Webber wants as he kn9ws best.
Any sales will only be what Webber wants he knows best
Sadly the theme us that Webber knows best, I just wonder how many top clubs have researched him for a possible role and seen one big EGO and decided no thanks.
Any manager will look on DF tenure and think how did it go so wrong once he left and the conclusion will be that he was sacrificed because Webber knows best.
Our poor millionaire owners have reached an impasse they have relinquished control to a combo of Ward and Webber one goes both go and Smith and Jones have no one to turn too or shield them from the supporters.
Mr Ego said that the owners pleaded with him to stay and he could take leave as and when he climbed a mountain, I’ve worked for employers and no one would beg you to stay it put them in a no win situation, We now have a Board and management system that’s not fit for purpose, no sound bites drifting across the pond, Tom Smith and his Wife along with Michael Foulger are like spare parts in a condom factory.
We all laughed at Ipshite under the previous ownership but he did cover their loses, Delia boasts we are dept free and self financing runs her catering business from the stadium has 2 weekly parties for her friends who reciprocate every other week so she’s happy but will that continue in league one when the offering will be much less to her liking.
Maybe your young mate got his first and second teams the right way round while you and me drew the short straw!
*Debt free Delia* has been busted to the tune of £55 million I’m afraid. The figure won’t be quite as bad as that at the end of the day of course, but nonetheless bad enough.
Webber does indeed know best and I think that is why you are probably right when you say he might have talked himself out of a job or two recently.
The trouble is that means he and his wife are still here, unfortunately.
“By Ian Mitchelmore reporting from Qatar” appears on all of his stories, despite the fact that judging by Twitter he was plainly at the game on Saturday. Another indication of what happens if newspaper companies get rid of all their subeditors and entrust the digital offerings to untrained twentysomethings. Not that Reach plc are alone in this, Archant have conducted exactly the same cost-cutting exercise…
Hi O-t a s-t h
Whoa there!
No, on second thoughts don’t hold your horses as you are quite right.
For Reach read NewsQuest also, although as you suggest Archant were already a long way down this rocky road before the deal was even struck.
A quick look at the EDP/EEN/Pink Un shows the decline all too clearly, although the standards of literacy on the Sport section are much higher than those on News so well done Paddy & Co.
The mistake these business types make is that while quite rightly assuming most younger readers do not much care about accuracy and proof-reading, they DO NOT HAVE any younger readers so just lose the older folks as well!
Cheers – good post.
What an excellent article and some seriously good comment yet again. The standard of writing both from “staffers” and the responders have made this the go to read for comment and opinion on Norwich City,
The buzzword at the moment is “disconnect”. I see it much more as a division. The ownership, their cronies and the band of fan boys and girls are oblivious of a large and growing feeling amongst the wider support. The dearth of ambition, the insidious influence of the webbers, the creepy supporter blamers in the clubs employ combined with the dreadfully uninspiring football and the prospect of either a scrambled promotion followed by yet another chronically underfunded humiliation or the financial meltdown and Delia led austerity are the factors which need to be addressed, corrected and laid to rest. A shot in the arm and a reinvigoration would soon reignite the passion and love for the CLUB. The shirt, the badge.
Without that this cadaverous stagnation will continue in order to keep the smiths and webbers in place at the expense of NCFC.
Lovely words, Chris. Much appreciated by all of the team, I’m sure.
We do our best and our Martin, in particular, is an absolute star.
Hi Chris
Gary’s on the money when he says your words are much appreciated.
These, however, are my pick of the crop:
*This cadaverous stagnation will continue in order to keep the Smiths and Webbers in place at the expense of NCFC*.
Cheers
I too, was disappointed that we didn’t have a well scouted replacement for Smith installed as the WC break began, though not surprised I should add!
But with that decision made we have little choice but to get behind the team and hope that the new animal is an elephant; near impossible to get the ball past, grey, ponderous but sharp upfront. Then we may still be able to pack our trunks ready for another tilt at the PL.
If an actual and genuine step has been made to make us hard to beat and defensively sound, then I think maybe just maybe those 4 weeks were well spent and maybe, just maybe Smith may be the man to actually secure us a survival season. How long have we bemoaned our inability to defend and cut out the silly mistakes?
Even if this is so, will we want to watch it?
If we have a rock to build on (Yes I doubt it too!) then a small selective bit of recruitment to finally implement whatever the attacking plan is, could suddenly have us all eating humble pie. His Brentford side wasn’t bad, maybe we need just a little more patience to evolve to where he wants us to go?
Or have I just been drinking?
Hi Winston
A lot depends on who is leading the elephant into the ring – Hannibal or Billy Smart!
I’ve not had a drink in nearly five months and my kite is on the guy with the red coat-tails and shiny black hat, but we’ll see!
James C will be pleased that you’re another one to pick up on his pachyderm 🙂
Seriously, you’re right about his incarnation of Brentford, they weren’t a bad side at all.
*A small selective bit of recruitment* is very necessary as I think we’d all agree.
Cheers
His Brentford side was built by Warburton and the recruitment was completed prior to him arriving from Walsall, The Villa team he inherited from Brucie was a good side and he won a promotion by the skin of his teeth.
He then went on a £100m spending spree and just survived, he then went on another £100m+ spree and got the sack.
He’s like Webber in many respects good at spending other people’s money with little end result.
Webber told the self protection route sacked the manager that made him look good when he should have walked for poor recruitment for the second time
It’s simplistic I know but I’d suggest two words to sum up the earlier successful recruitment under Webber.
1; Kieran
2: Scott.
Whether the recruitment was done before his arrival or not, he got a decent tune out of the side, so for me all hope of a decent team playing good football is not entirely lost.
I do agree that he didn’t exactly pull up trees at Villa, but much like Farke I think his successes there were very much linked to one exceptional player. His Villa would have been nothing without Grealish, I think the same can be said for Farke without Buendia. Our stats without him were very poor.
Where I will take a little umbridge is the criticism of Webber. Webber not only hired Farke, but purchased Buendia and several other players that our recent relative success was built on, that would have included the employment of Keiron Scott.
Things of course change and his more recent recruitment and decision making is rightly being scrutinised, but I’d still back him ahead of a return to ameteur hour or handing things over to NA. With that said his more recent dealings with the press and the way he has handled climbingate would not have me crying if he was sacked or moved on either.
Hi M+o+O
I tend to agree about Grealish and Buendia and am sad to see that the latter has not progressed at Villa.
As for Webber I think the more many of us learn of his personality the less support there is for him.
It’s ridiculous to say this about a man I’ve never met, but I really don’t think I would like him very much and the same certainly applies to his colleague, Mr Richens. More so in fact.
The trouble is that so much opinion is subjective in instances like this!
Cheers